Progress: painful or pleasurable?
Opportunity lies before us, to claim lasting prosperity or lasting dysfunction
A brief history of technology
Is it just me, or are we living in an incredible time?! Take a glance at the morning news on a daily basis and you’re likely to read about a technological breakthrough in some industry. The technology on my phone wasn’t even on the market just five years ago. And, with the introduction of AI, the technology released this year will have orders of magnitude greater capability than the ones just last year. That reminds me, I better go start a savings account for the new MacBook Pro…
Take a few steps back, and the scene becomes even more impressive. Fifty years ago, in 1974, computers were gigantic machines which only major corporations could afford to purchase and maintain, mobile phones were unheard of, and, most different from our time, the Miami Dolphins somehow found a way to win the Super Bowl.
Take it one step further and the picture really comes into view. One hundred years ago, in 1924, the hottest tech was radio, cars, and flight. Women had just gained the right to vote, the life expectancy was 54 years (26 years younger than today), heroin and mercury were prescribed medications, communication was limited to letters and few-and-far-between landlines, and movies were still silent.
It is universally agreed that the past 100 years, and especially the last 30 years, have been the greatest period of innovation and progress the world has ever seen. Encyclopedia Britannica put it this way: “Despite the immense achievements of technology by 1900, the following decades witnessed more advance over a wide range of activities than the whole of previously recorded history. The airplane, the rocket and interplanetary probes, electronics, atomic power, antibiotics, insecticides, and a host of new materials have all been invented and developed to create an unparalleled social situation, full of possibilities and dangers, which would have been virtually unimaginable before the present century.” Yes, we are living in the most exciting and compelling time of societal progress the world has ever seen, by far.
However, with such immense power in our phones, cars, and governments, the age-old wisdom first penned in the French Revolution (and then popularized by Uncle Ben in Spiderman), has proven true once again: “With great power comes great responsibility.”1
Just as the progress of the industrial revolution brought with it growing pains of deplorable working conditions, increased levels of child labor, and countless environmental and health impacts from poor manufacturing standards, the progress of our time has brought growing pains and sorrows of its own.
Our world is suffering
Since the beginning of the digital revolution (1980s), the world has experienced highly concerning trends in critical areas for health and societal well-being. Diagnoses for depression and anxiety rose 63% from 2005 to 2017, with women experiencing the greatest increases. Suicides rates increased 33% from 2001 to 2017, increasing fastest among minority and youth demographics. One in six women experience a sexual assault or rape in their lifetime, an incredibly traumatic event. Major and highly popular pornographic websites like PornHub, which receives 3.5 billion visits per month (6th most visited website in the world), distribute hundreds of thousands of videos containing rape and child trafficking, profiting wildly off of the worst moments in people’s lives. And the overlap of political views has decreased tremendously, leading to heightened political polarization and tension. The pains of progress have not been minor in any form over the past thirty years.
Doom and gloom is not the human way, however. From ice ages to world wars, humans are incredibly adept at overcoming tragedy and struggle. Yes, I firmly believe hope is not lost. In fact, I believe our hope has never been brighter.
Reason to hope
After the world had time to grapple with the pains of the revolutionary progress from the industrial revolution, further progress was found, and lots of it. Unions were formed, ensuring fair treatment and rights for workers, especially minorities. Children received protections which paved the way for greater investment in public education, a major propellant of economies and innovation. And through it all, humans somehow found a way to not only use new technology to fly, but even to land on the moon.
Digital technology is not our problem. Countering every concerning statistic is a mountain of evidence to demonstrate how digital technology has facilitated growth, prosperity, and progress for humanity. No, it is not digital technology, but rather our inappropriate use of digital technology which has ailed the human race these past thirty years or so. We have not wielded our great power with the great responsibility it demands, if it is to be sustainable.
I have the privilege of working for Relay Health, a company focused on addiction recovery and behavior change. Relay is an app-based recovery program, pursuing the insight that digital technology can facilitate an empowering, healing, recovery process. This ideology is encapsulated in our motto, “Do recovery smarter.”
On a daily basis, I watch as individuals, some of whom have struggled for decades, change, and realize a level of joy they never thought possible after the mistakes they’d made. It is one of my favorite things, and yet I’ve never met any of these people in person. How can this be? The appropriate use of the wonder which is digital technology.
Learning from addiction recovery groups
Before I proceed much further, some of you may question my comparison of addicts to you via my introduction of Relay. Without diving in too deeply, I would share that, at its core, self-medicating is self-medicating. As human beings, we’re all wired to escape pain and discomfort. Whether by alcohol, pornography, food, or endlessly scrolling social media, almost everyone develops coping strategies to deal with the difficulties of life — often negatively impacting our health. True, the nature and severity of unhealthy “coping” may look different from person to person, but the root causes tend to be quite similar.
At the center of Relay’s ideology is the belief that we, as humans, change and improve our behavior much more effectively when we involve others. A standard societal example of this is the role of therapists in supporting those with clinical depression, which has been shown to decrease suicide attempts by 40%.Peer-based support groups have also been shown to be effective. I’ve observed this to be true in the lives of Relay members, of whom 80% report an improvement in their recovery within the first month of working with a group.
Genuine connection is powerful in response to technology misuse because it counters its effects directly. Digital technology, when used inappropriately by social media platforms, pornographic sites, and news feeds, is isolating, dividing, and fear-inducing. The social feed is ever alluring and visually appealing, but we usually leave feeling worse about ourselves and society. Authentic, vulnerable connection on the other hand is validating, unifying, and empowering. We leave knowing we belong, have inherent value, and that we can make a difference. Sustainable societal progress is predicated upon meaningful connection, for at our root, we are deeply social creatures.
Though compelling at face value, learning to embrace genuine, vulnerable, connection is no small task. It often appears to me more akin to a lyric from the Broadway musical, “Dear Evan Hansen,” in which we must overcome the fear of past burns and learn to “step out into the sun.”2
Slow healing
Especially true for those recovering from complex addictions, recovery and behavior change take time. The old concept of three weeks being all it takes to form a habit has been disproven, with experts agreeing on a timeline closer to 60 days (8 weeks) for any sustainable habit formation.This statistic includes a wide range of variance, especially for more challenging behavior change like addictions and compulsive behaviors, where experts usually prescribe a year or more for lasting change, noting recovery is truly a lifelong pursuit. The extended duration needed to sustainably change behavior is due to neural networks and the need to rewire how the brain has learned to function. The great news, however, is change is not only possible, but what our brains are built to do!
As with most of life’s most valuable rewards, changing behavior and embracing genuine connection is a journey. At some points we reach mountain tops and the world is before us, and at other times we reside in the valley of the shadow of despair and doubt we can ever make it. This is great! As a therapist once told me, “The healing is in the journey.”
Truly, our deepest sense of identity is proven through the travails of a strenuous journey. Much like a marathon, the process of overcoming struggle and pursuing our goal to the end rewards us with lessons, and a confidence thereon, which we could only have obtained by running that race.
The key to navigating the highs and lows of behavior change is perspective. The foundation of perspective is a clear purpose, as it focuses and contextualizes our efforts. Whether it’s to connect more meaningfully with family, stop wasting time so you can finally learn the guitar, or anything else, a purpose is what grounds and motivates us.
Considering our overall progress and trajectory is critical to maintaining motivation, especially during periods in the valley of the shadow of death. By stepping back and observing the distance we’ve come, the elevation we’ve gained, and the overall upward trend we are on, hearts worn weary can reignite again with recognition of progress.
Contributing with passion
The concept of a thriving life has fascinated me since I first learned of it, especially as much of my life I feel as if I am merely surviving. Dr. Stacy Taniguchi of Brigham Young University defines a thriving life as one in which you have clear, prioritized values, which are reflected in your daily actions. The thriving life is evasive however, because the distractions which pull us from our value-driven course are endless. To thrive requires determination, self-awareness, patience, grit, and similar virtues of self-mastery.
And now, here's why I have such great hope for our generation.
Our growing pains have risen with the level of our progress, having yet inflicted countless wounds upon society as a whole, and have the potential to forever handicap our growth. However, humans are intelligent, resilient beings extremely capable of adaptation. This is evidenced in you reading these words, in pursuit of freedom from the growing pains and sorrows of our time.
The journey for us to change not only our personal behaviors but the whole of society is not, and will never be, a crystal stair. It is surely ridden with great valleys of despair. However, it’s called a valley because it lies directly below a mountain peak. Otherwise it would only be a grassland. So, as we traverse the valleys of behavior and societal change, let us remember that just beyond lies a victory. And let us take with us the unique lessons of awareness, moderation, intentionality, empathy, humility, and genuine connection we learn along the way which propelled our true, sustainable, progress.
I firmly believe that as we strive forward, learn from, and help others along this journey, our reward will be far more valuable than if we had never embarked upon it. In the words of the wise Will Smith,
“The best things in life are on the other side of fear.”
When we learned and adapted to take up the responsibility and power of the industrial revolution, we landed on the moon. With the power and responsibility of digital technology appropriately handled, who knows how high we’ll fly.
The mistakes of the past need not be our future. Opportunity lies before us, to claim lasting prosperity or lasting dysfunction. The choice is ours to make.
In the spirit of decisions which seem to loom large and dark, I offer a favorite moment of mine from the classic film, “Dead Poets Society:”
“We are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. Medicine, law, business, engineering, these are all noble pursuits, and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for.
To quote from Whitman: ‘O me, o life of the questions of these recurring, of the endless trains of the faithless, of cities filled with the foolish. What good amid these, o me, o life?
Answer: that you are here. That life exists, and identity. That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.
That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse…’
What will your verse be?”
Key Takeaways
You are not the problem
Society is once again experiencing the growing pains of progress
The time you’ve wasted, and mistakes you may have made, are not time lost, but time greatly invested, if approached deliberately in order to improve
“The only real mistake is the one from which you learn nothing”(John Powell)
Together, we can change, and become a more unified, empowered people than the world has ever known
One day at a time
Adam Meadows currently studies business strategy at Brigham Young University and works as a product manager for Relay Health and Kiba. He is passionate about using technology to solve the world’s problems.
"Collection Générale des Décrets Rendus par la Convention Nationale." Chez Baudouin, Imprimeur de la Convention, 8 May 1793, p. 72.
Pasek, Benj, and Justin Paul. "Dear Evan Hansen." Music Theatre International, 2015.